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Three Case Studies on Dirty Talk and Texts:What Worked and What Didn’t

It is commonly known that different tactics and methods work in different ways and have different effects of everyone. When trying to figure out the best tactics to initiate a session of dirty talk or dirty texting, you want to make sure that you personalize the experience to your relationship. Whether you are a beginner or a more seasoned dirty talker, it takes some practice and consideration. Here are some stories of what worked and what didn’t work for different women.


I never thought of myself as being a prude. In fact, I always thought that I was what I liked to describe as a bit “saucy”. I am spontaneous and very open minded in most areas. I am usually the one that takes most of the risks in a relationship. The guys that I have dated usually call me daring and claim that I have taken them to heights that they never imaged, not just sexually. I think outside of the box. When I met Chris, I found out that I was considered pretty tame compared to him.

I was thrown aback a little bit when he first started texting me dirty texts. I did not have any aversion to a little sex talk, but he took it to a completely different level. I really did not feel like it was a term of endearment to be called his dirty little bitch. In fact, I was a bit offended. I did not respond to him and when he came over, I felt uneasy. He asked me what was wrong and I brought up the messages that he sent me. He laughed a bit but got serious when he saw that I was not joking. We talked about it and now I know that he was not trying to be crass. His dirty talk is a verbal equivalent to rough sex.

Now we have some of the hottest dirty talk and text sessions ever. Even a girl like me can be taught some new tricks.


Marcus was my very first boyfriend. We started dating in high school and all the way through college. He was my first everything. My parents are pretty old school and I was raised traditionally. I was always categorized as the goody two shoes.

Marcus was always big on phone sex and he used to get in trouble for running up the phone bill calling those 976 and 900 numbers. When we finally were old enough to get our cell phones, he used to text me these really sexual messages. He was really into the whole dirty talk thing.

I felt awkward even when we were intimate and he talked to me. I started responding to him by simply answering his questions. I said yes a lot. I tried taping myself on the phone to see what I sounded like if I were to talk back to him. It really was not too bad. I was not confident at all. Once I figured out that I sounded hot and talked to him with confidence, he loved it.

We will be married for eight years this year and have two beautiful children and we still talk dirty to each other.


I made the mistake of thinking that dirty talk and texting is a one size fits all. I figured what one boyfriend liked is what any other guys would like. This mistake almost cost me my relationship. I can look back now and laugh in retrospect but it was far from funny at the time.

My old boyfriend used to like me to tell him how bad I was and how I wanted him to do all kinds of things to me. He liked it when I told him how I found other guys attractive and how I could imagine them debasing me in all kinds of dirty ways.

I tried this with my new boyfriend and he flipped out. He really thought that I was either cheating or contemplating cheating. I am so glad that he gave me that chance to explain what my intentions were. He explained to me that imagining another guy touching me not only repulsed him but it also made him angry.  He was really into me telling him specific compliments about his own body, though, and once I focused my efforts there things really took off. We now share a very loving and intimate relationship.

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